If you go by the extravagant depiction of a big, fat wedding that’s shown in the movies, it seems like everything is so glittery, hopeful and happy. But, real life begins after that. When all the celebration dies down, the guests have gone back to their home and all the gifts have been unwrapped, that’s when it would hit you that you’re truly married to your significant other. That’s when you realise the wedding is over and the marriage begins.
What Makes A Marriage Healthy?
If we are going to talk about a happy marriage checklist then we have to know first what makes a marriage strong and healthy? We tell you how to create a healthy marriage checklist.
Trust is the most important thing in a relationship. A marriage will plunge into trouble if there are trust issues but if trust stays intact a marriage can weather all stormsThere should he healthy relationship boundaries that includes emotional boundaries tooCompromises and adjustments should not be done at the drop of a hat but when done it should not be looked at as favours that spouses do to each other. It should come spontaneously and without any doubtsCommunication should be the constant companion in any healthy marriage because that is what will help spouses tide over the ups and downs
Here’s the ultimate happy marriage checklist to ensure that the two of you’ll have a blissful union. If you are looking for solid marriage advice then go through this checklist. It’s not easy to have a peaceful marriage but that does not mean you don’t work on the things that you have swept under the rug.
7 Point Ultimate Happy Marriage Checklist
No one is ever prepared to deal with a reality called marriage and how the real life begins once the honeymoon phase is over. So mistakes happen, arguments take place and you might feel lost. But there are some small and simple things you can do to ensure that things stay in your control and you can enjoy a healthy married life.
1. Ensure there are rewards for chores
Dividing house chores proportionately does not come by easily. And that can lead to some passive aggressiveness in women more than men. While life at home is far different from life at work, there’s one similarity in both – put a reward in sight and the work will be done faster. So if you ask your husband to do the laundry, tell him that he’d be rewarded for the same in bed. And you’ll see the relationship between the work and its reward. It will in turn lead to a happy marriage. A healthy married life means sharing the work burden at home with a smile.
2. Don’t constantly pursue him emotionally
Women are inherently fixers, wanting to know everything ASAP, while your husband might be the kind who likes his space. Do not always press him to tell things when he is emotionally stressed. Everyone likes some room to breathe and evaluate things. Survival of a marriage depends on how open and easy-going your conversations can be without the feeling of being nagged and judged all the time.
3. Attack the problem, not the spouse
Arguments with your spouse are healthy. But often, the arguments go all out of hand. Instead of focusing on the issue at hand, we all tend to be impulsive and say things in blind anger. So try not to assassinate your husband’s character. Don’t generalize things. Don’t use words like ‘never’ and ‘always’ while arguing because that doesn’t leave any scope for change and growth.
4. Keep your conversations simple
It’s not an unlikely situation that you want to have a serious conversation with your better half and he just wouldn’t want to go there. So try to keep things simple and straightforward instead of beating around the bush. Also, try to keep your tone even and friendly. A lot of communication happens without words. There are some couples communication exercises that are great fun and that can keep the conversation going.
5. Don’t be afraid if you’re not on the same page
Marriage doesn’t guarantee that the two of you will always stand on some common ground. There will be issues where both of you will think differently and have different opinions. On such occasions instead of going on a fight or flight mode try to put your point across in a non-argumentative or defensive manner. When you’re open to the idea of change and adjustment, your partner will take notice of the same and try as well. It’s not an issue being at odds, so do not be afraid. Try to hear and be heard and you’ll both come on some mutual agreement and this will lead to a happy marriage. If you are looking at a healthy marriage checklist then difference of opinion is to totally healthy. It all depends on how you deal with it. Good marriages actually celebrate difference of opinion.
6. Treat your spouse like you’d treat a child
It’s so easy hyping a child for every small thing they achieve yet we forget doing it for the adults around us. Treat your partner the same way. Applaud for their every accomplishment. And then there are ways to show them you them. Tell them repeatedly how much you love them and what they mean to you. Make them feel as special as you’d make a child feel. Appreciating for every specific thing they do will also remind them of all the things you like about them. This is a sure sign that you are ticking the right boxes in your happy marriage checklist.
7. Touch often
A simple hug or a kiss on their cheek or even a simple smile just directed at them is a lot. It does stand for a happy marriage. Caught up in every day work, it’s easy to forget the little things that you used to do for each other. And usually, these tender touches are the first to go. That way you make sure, they know they are your priority regardless of the amount of work. Without that physical connection, you risk becoming more like roommates rather than lovers. Physical intimacy is as much important in a relationship as is emotional intimacy or intellectual intimacy. With these seven check boxes are ticked, maintaining a relationship wouldn’t feel like a hard job for you at all. Your marriage will rock. It will be the ultimate happy marriage.
